Finding partners can be tough, and especially so if there is a tendency to over-analyze their initial moves in the relationship. Sometimes, people behave in a perfectly healthy way at the start of a relationship that is misunderstood or misinterpreted. Realizing what is actually healthy and what is not may save a relationship from failing before it even really gets started. Here are some warning signals that should only warn you of sanity.
1. Some may be wary if their new date doesn’t immediately respond to texts. This may make the person look uninterested or apathetic to the potential correspondence, but it could mean that the person just isn’t constantly plugged into technology. They may have other interests outside of the cell phone, or may just be waiting for a good time to set aside and give you 100% of their attention. Forbes recently wrote an article on how constantly being on a smart phone increases stress and reduces productivity.
2. Some new partners may be upset if the other wants to hang out with their friends alone. Not introducing you to their existing friends and setting time aside to be alone with friends are two different things. Continuing to see existing friends outside of a relationship shows loyalty to a life already being lived. Also, having a life outside of a relationship shows that the person has a well balanced perception on their priorities. As long as your partner is keeping healthy relationships outside of yours, then you are able to have the time to do that as well.
3. Some may be concerned if their new partners continue to date other people and they’re open about it. This can actually lead to a healthier relationship. If you end up with this person long term it isn’t because he or she settled. They had other options, but chose to stay with you. This is a great way to tell that you have a special connection with your partner.
So, what if he doesn’t immediately disclose his entire life story? While feeling like a stranger to your partner is not a good feeling, it is not fair or healthy to not allow time for a relationship to grow. It is healthy to be guarded when meeting new people, so if it takes a while for your partner to become vulnerable to you, that is a good thing. Changingminds explains that being vulnerable leads to trust, which will then allow a strong, healthy relationship.
It may seem direct and off-putting if a partner is up front with you about their feelings on the relationship. This could go one of two ways, either making you feel like you are attached to a clinger or making you feel rejected. This is a very healthy method of communication, however. As long as a partner is up front with their feelings, the other person is able to know there the relationships stands and plan accordingly.
It can be easy to go through partners if every move they make is over analyzed. Be careful about disqualifying people for doing things that don’t seem right, but are actually healthy behaviors. Partners who are open and honest and continue to lead a life outside of the relationship are the ones who are loyal and in the relationship for the long term. Always keep an open mind before ending a relationship.